Stepfamily

Positive Steps to Take in a Stepfamily Situation

The primary relationship in a marriage should be that of the couple. Create an on-going pattern of communication with each other.

Provide couple unity in family issues for the benefit of the children.
Be aware of the different lifestyles and value systems, which are being combined into your stepfamily situation.
Show the same respect for your stepchildren as you expect from them.
Consider the combined children as ours, not yours or mine.
Remember that your biological children know you better than your new spouse. Be aware of your over protectiveness as a biological parent.
Consider the children living apart from the new stepfamily as being as much a part of the stepfamily as those living within.
Keep communicatin open, whenever possible, with ex-spouses for the sake of the children.
Appreciate the individuality of each child in the stepfamily.
Provide a reasonable territorial space for each family member.
Address financial issues before the marriage to a mutually acceptable term. Continue to negotiate monetary adjustments with each other.
Be flexible in resolving issues and be willing to try various alternatives. Everyone makes mistakes. If you find yourselves unable to come to a solution, seek professional guidance and counseling.
Keep a sense of humor.
Raise the consciousness of your family, friends, teachers, and clergy about the uniqueness of a stepfamily.

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